Rusty Blue Bikes and Hummers

EXT. SUBURBAN ROAD

Brigitte is racing down the road on her rusty, blue bike (which she has not used in years). She frantically pedals as fast as her lack of holiday exercise allows.

Brigitte (V.O.)

Ah, great. I thought that I was supposed to set up some form of exercise schedule.

Behind Brigitte is Joy, possessed by some sort of other force. She is in a Hummer, at full speed after Brigitte.

Joy

(in a mad muttering way)

Goddammit Brigitte! I ask you to write one lousy blog post and all you do is fucking copy me!

BRIGITTE

I had nothing left! I didn't know what to post!

Joy

That's no excuse. Now you shall pay.

Joy accelerates (even though she was at full speed before). The front of the Hummer nicks the back of Brigitte's bike, sending her flying off the bike, onto the road. Her arm is missing.

BRIGITTE

Oh my god! I can't feel my arm! Well, I can, but it's just pain! How am I supposed to play the violin?!

Joy

You sucked anyway.

Joy reveals a rifle, loads it and finishes Brigitte off with a crude blow to the head, sending bits of brain flying everywhere.

Joy

Argh. Now I have to find someone else to blog with.